a curious trunk explores for bananas

Some kids go to summer camp.  Some go to Spanish, Bible or Hebrew camp.  This kid went to elephant camp.  

I spent the majority of two days last week at Thom’s Pai Elephant Camp riding and playing with elephants.  Although the big guys (or gals in this case) were cool, I’m afraid I can only give elephant camp a 5 out of 10.  

Along with six other people, I kicked off the first morning feeding bananas to a group of four elephants, all girls.  The elephants go absolutely nuts for bananas and to get them, they performed many tricks, some orchestrated, some not.  One elephant would play the harmonica.  Another would stick out her tongue.  Anything for a banana.  I was trying to solicit a hug from one (just hold the banana behind your back and she’ll wrap her trunk around you in an elephant version of a bear hug) when her neighbor decided to get in on the action.  In a matter of seconds I had trunks swirling all around me, tickling and playing tug of war with me trying to get at the bananas.  Unlike the Balinese monkeys and despite the size difference, however, it was all in good fun.  I sustained no bites or stomped toes.

Then we climbed aboard and went for a two hour elephant ride.  To get on their back, some of the elephants permit you to stand on their trunk and they hoist you up over their heads.  Others extend a leg as your route to their back.  My elephant, Ot (which ironically means “Little Frog” preferred the former.  Ot earned her bananas that day giving 3 of us a lift for the tour.  Except for a blanket, we basically rode bareback.  

Ot gives me a quick lift to my room ... and a photo opp

Some things surprised me about the elephants. Their trunks, which they use playfully as well as to snatch food, are not soft as I’d thought they would be.  In fact, there’s nothing soft about an elephant (except for their tongues).  They are rough and scratchy with 3 inch long prickly hairs that feel surprisingly close to a toilet brush.  Imagine two hours of this toilet brush abrading your calves as every two seconds a rock hard spine bangs against one side of your tail bone and then the other … and you’ve got yourself an elephant ride.  Oh, I forgot the roller coaster portion where we headed down a steep slope with nothing to hold on to.  Although Ot was incredibly careful with her footing, gravity just didn’t permit we three riders to remain in our original positions.  We all slid down toward the head and ended up piled on poor Ot’s neck. I was convinced that we would all topple down her trunk at any second - it was really quite frightening.  Sweet Ot  was gracious about the whole thing allowing us to re-situate when we did finally make it to the bottom of the hill.  Although, later at the river, she was following orders when she repeatedly hosed us down with water and then shook us off her back, dumping us in the water, I’m not convinced that she didn’t do so happily as a little bit of payback.  

So I have to conclude that in general, elephant riding isn’t really all it’s cracked up to be.  As I reflect on all the photos I’ve seen of Asian kings being carried in regal style on a pachyderm, I find it hard to believe that monarchs would allow themselves to be so abused.  Needless to say, although the exorbitant funds I paid to attend elephant camp included as much riding as I wanted, the first experience was more than enough and I passed on the rest.  

banana tree snacks

As a result, playing with the elephants became the highlight of elephant camp.  I soon discovered, however, that in the absence of bananas, the elephants are generally uninterested in much interaction … and it wasn’t long before the camp ran out of bananas.  Looking for something to do, I was happy to accompany some of the camp employees who said they were going to chop down bananas.  That should be interesting, I thought. Turns out, they chopped down entire banana trees!  No surprise if I really thought about it - elephants eat EVERYTHING afterall.  I was interested to see that banana trees are really more of a large plant than a tree.  Their stems have large cells with lots of water; not woody at all.  I counted 27 banana trees that were loaded into the pickup truck.  The driver told me that what seemed like a large number of trees to me would only last the camp’s four elephants one day! 

Later in the day, I went with the mahouts (elephant handlers) to “put the elephants to bed in the jungle” (this is phrasing from the camp advertisement).  The girls were walking single file down a narrow path and I was walking behind them talking with one of the mahouts when I had the once in a lifetime (I hope!) experience of being farted on by the last elephant.  NOT one of the camp highlights!  I can tell you from first hand experience that elephant farts are WAY stinkier than dog farts … and we all know how bad those can be!  

Thom's Pai Elephant Camp

Smelly wind instruments aside, the elephants and the mahouts were great and I give them two thumbs up.  Thom’s Elephant Camp doesn’t fare so well.  I never got the “elephant training” instruction that I paid for and repeatedly asked for.  Additionally, the camp was amazingly stingy with their resources.  My fees included 3 meals a day.  By my choice, I only ate one of those each day, but was hunted down like a thief for 15 baht (about $0.40) when I took a soda from the fridge.  Also, despite there being many empty bunglalows available, Thom insisted I share her bungalow since a shared bungalow was what I had paid for.  Two other “long-timers” at the camp also expressed some displeasure toward the end of their stay regarding similar issues.  Bottom line … if you’re in the area, stop by and feed the elephants bananas (which you can do for free), go for a ride if the above description appeals to you but otherwise, save your money and skip the camp. 

Now that I’ve checked monkeys, tigers and elephants off the list, I guess I need to seek out some bears … or maybe the elusive Irawaddy dolphin.

Videos from elephant camp coming soon … I hope!